HAHAHAHAHAHA! Mega busy si Cheapangga Harangera lately dahil hina-harass niya ang mga politicians para magpahawak sa kanya ng kanilang PR.
Nakatatawang ilusyunadang maging pralaling siya ng mga ito gayung wala naman siyang knowhow in this department. Hakhakhakhakhakhakhak!
Anyway, wala na siyang problema kay Cong. Roman Romulo dahil lahat ng projects nang Pasig congressman ay hawak na niya. Hahahahahaha!
Ikaw na ang maging mapanira at kamkamera sa ‘career’ ng iba. Hahahahahahahaha!
Go! Isaksak mo sa mataba mong baga ang lahat ng raket sa sanlibutan for all I care!
Gets nang gets guranggita at ipagpatuloy mo rin ang pagbulong kina Atty. Jun Nardo, Mr. Jhun Lalin at Madam Shirley Pizarro. Hahahahahahahahahaha!
I am not in any way affected.
Nabuhay ako na hinaharangan mo na way back during the mid-80s (hello, Bhoy Navarette, are you reading this piece amigo? Hahahahahahahaha!), I don’t see any reason why I can’t survive now.
Anyway, what’s this I hear na kinu-convince mo na naman daw ang isang chinky-eyed politician na ma-etsapwera kami sa presscon nito? Hahahahahahahahaha!
Go nang go, Lolang Eklatera Kuflangera. You can exhaust your connections and tell these people that we are not in any way worthy of their time and attention and that you and your cohort are the ones they should pay attention to. Hahahahahahahahahahaha!
‘Nga pala, why aren’t you telling Cong. Roman Romulo to pull out his ad to our Star Na Star radio show at DWIZ (It’s 882 khz in your radio dial, muchacha, and we go on the air from Monday thru Fri- day, 1:30 to 2:30 in the afternoon. Hahahahahahaha!)?
Di ba sanggang dikit ka sa kanya dahil hawak mo before (hindi ba ngayon Salbakuta? Hahahahahahaha!) ang misis niyang si Shalani Soledad na nakasama namin sa UNTV37 ni Peter Ledesma?
Magaling ka ngang bumulong Vavalinang gurangski, (Vavalinang gurangski raw, o!Harharharharharhar!), why don’t you ask Cong. Romulo to have a presscon one of these days and invite Peter and I.
Aren’t you aware that my bff has been dying to pull your hair for all the panghaharang that you’ve done and still doing to us? Harharharharharharhar!
Ka-amuse naman! Hahahahahahahahahaha!
Dati talaga, and this was prior to your cheap panghaharang, Cong. Romulo would drop by at DWIZ to invite us to lunch. Pero dahil sa paninira mong demonya ka, we lost a good friend.
Come to think of it, you’ve always been like that. Once na makatunog ka na may little PR job ako or kami ni Peter L. for that matter, paandarin mo na naman ang mga galamay ni Zuma para i-down kami at sira-siraan.
Kumusta naman? You might be moneyed and well connected but ironically, your money would not suffice to make you look presentable and attractive. Hahahahahahahahaha!
Mukha ka pa ring tikbalang with your gross (yucky! Hahahahahahaha!) pot-belly and elongated physiognomy.
Elongated physiognomy raw, o! Hahahahahahahahahahaha!
O, siya! Till our next deadline. I surely am dying to write about your ignominious doings in the biz. Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!
What a shame! Vicki Belo paid a huge sum for your Stem Cell chorva and physical well being, but so far, I haven’t seen any visual improvement. Hahahahahahahaha!
Vavalina ka pa rin at namumutlang parang cadaver (parang cadaver raw, o! Hahahahahahaha!) without your make-up on. Hahahahahahahahahaha!
Beauty kasi is skin deep. Kulapulan mo man nang kung anu-anong kaeklatan ang mukha mo, if what’s inside happens to be a demonic (demonic raw, o! Hakhakhakhakhakhak!) heart, to no avail. Hahahahaha!
‘Yun lang!
Babu, gurangga! Hahahahahahahahahahahaha!
BONGGA ANG GUESTING SA ASAP NG LEGENDARY JUKEBOX QUEENS!
Kabogera ang guesting ng Legendary Jukebox Queens na sina Claire, Eva at Imelda (no surnames are needed for they’re so famous, their first name would suffice. Hahahahahahaha!) sa Jukebox Portion ng ASAP.
Talaga namang kwela ang cool portion nina Ms. Claire at Marcelito Pomoy, na sinundan ng wacky tandem nina Eva at Luis Manzano at eventually, ang nakatutuwang duet nina Alex Gonzaga with matching modulation (Hahahahahahahaha! love it!) at jukebox queen Ms. Imelda.
Inasmuch as maraming jukebox personalities ang nag-guest sa ASAP, veritable stand-out talaga ang triumvirate ng jukebox divas dahil let’s admit it, iba naman talaga ang kanilang na-achieve sa music industry.
Through the years, paborito pa ring pakinggan ang walang kamatayang Sayang ni Ms. Claire, Tukso ni Ms. Eva at Bakit ni Ms. Imelda. Oo nga’t marami ring pangmasang awitin ang sa ngayo’y paborito ng masang Pinoy but it can’t be denied that these ageless belles are still unmatched when it comes to this department.
Catch them at Resorts World Manila’s Newport Performing Arts Theater on August 31.
I’m sure it’s an event you should not miss!
Musical director nga pala ng show si Butch Miraflor at special guest artist si Leonard Santos under the production of Supernova Girls Productons, Inc.
NAG-REACT ANG MISTER SA CHIKANG BINIBIGYAN NA LANG SIYA NG ALLOWANCE NG KANYANG MISIS!
Hahahahahahahahahaha! Na-shock pala ang kakakasal palang na singer/actress dahil nag-react daw ang kanyang mister sa kanyang pronouncement sa isang interview na binibigyan na lang siya ng allowance nang kanyang mister.
Hahahahahahahahahaha!
Palibhasa’y newly wed lang, hindi pa nila alam ang pag-uugali ng bawat isa kaya laking gulat ng mahusay na singer/actress nang mag-react in an almost violent manner ang kanyang mister sa mga chikang on allowance na lang ito sa kanya.
Sa nasabing interview, sinabi naman ng comedic actress na iniintrega ng kanyang mister ang lahat ng kinikita nito kaya in return, binibigyan na lang niya ito ng allowance.
Mukhang hindi raw maganda ang dating noon sa mister kaya biglang kinausap ng comedic actress ang entertainment writer na i-delete na lang ang allowance chorva sa internet. Hahahahahahaha!
Akala kasi ni mama ay okay lang lahat kay papa. Ang ‘di niya knowing, nasasagi ang male ego nito sa on allowance thing na sinabi niya. Hahahahahahahahaha!
‘Yun nah!
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Send in those sizzling stories that you know about our fave showbiz personalities at peteampoloquiojr@gmail.com and #09994269588, #09276557791 and #09223870129 and read them here.
And with that, ito po ang kuya Pete ninyo na nagsasabing, Christopher, my son, I love you very, very much, my love for you goes beyond eternity. Adios. Mabalos. I always need you, Nong! DAPAT LANG!/PETE G. AMPOLOQUIO, JR.